A question for you…
Actually, I have a few questions for you:
What’s the best thing that could happen to you
right now? What would happen if you doubled
your sales? What if you got twice as much
done in your day? What would it be like if all
your business and personal relationships were
effortless? What could you do to make your
business thrive?
Ask yourself: Are you asking enough
questions every day?
For most of us, the answer is ‘no.’ Let’s take a
look at why…
To start, what do all those above questions
have in common? Obviously they are all
questions. Nothing shocking there.
They are completely open-ended questions.
They don’t look for a “yes” or a “no” but instead
for some original thought in the answer.
They don’t communicate judgment or bias
towards the pending answers. Also, they don’t
imply an expectation of specific answers.
Therefore, because they are “opinion neutral”
and open-ended, they empower the person
being asked to come up with their own original
answer, leading to creative thinking, new ideas
and better results.
Finally, they all start with the word “what”. As
we all learned in school, questions can start
with many different words, and we’ve been
taught to mix it up. But the questions above,
and many powerful others that can change our
business, relationships and spur success,
typically start with the word “what”. What’s
behind that?
“What’s with the ‘what’?”
Changing your asking habits is not easy.
Questions that start with “why” are the ones
that usually pop into our heads. They are
shorter and often seem more to the point. In
our world, we value brevity and directness.
Time is valuable, so we like quick thinking and
quick acting. But “why” questions are often
leading, negatively charged or rhetorical, all of
which negate the point of asking.
“Why did you do that?”
This is a common one for all of us. Often it
means you did something wrong, and it may
sound more like a statement than a question.
Consider a common scenario, such as a
manager looking for feedback from an
employee on something the employee wrote.
“Why did you write it like that?”
This question from a manager can make an
employee worry about coming up with the
“right” answer or feel they have to justify their
work. But it’s possible the manager was just
curious about the choice of words, and not
intending to communicate an opinion or a
judgment. A great alternative question might
be: “What were you hoping the reader would
take away from that wording?”
This gets to the underlying issue.
This question digs deeper to what the manager
really wants, which is to determine the possible
result of the work, not the emotional reasoning
of the employee when they wrote it. It gets to
the real issue faster and in a more supportive
way, which in turn empowers the employee and
further builds the relationship between manager
and employee. Sounds like a useful concept to
have in a business, doesn’t it?
You might even use a “what” question to follow
up a question that you were asked:
“Should I go ahead and run the program?”
Instead of saying, “No, I don’t think you’re
ready,” how about trying any of the following:
“What are some of the alternatives?”
“What would be the outcome if you waited?”
“What’s a possible benefit to doing it next
week?”
And the answers you get back may actually
give you feedback that you really hadn’t
considered, taking things in a completely new
direction. Improving the decision-making
process, encouraging team work, and having
better results would just be side effects.
The Challenge…
The next article I send will be how to
incorporate these ideas to supercharge your
networking and sales…
But before I send that out, I would like to ask
you to challenge yourself:
Track your progress on asking ten “what”
questions for the next three days to clients,
co-workers, family members, etc., when your
first instinct is to either give feedback or ask
a “why” question.
See how their reactions are different from the
ones you have come to expect. And also note
how the path forward unfolds from that interaction
and what positives changes occur both immediately
and long-term.
So, you now you have it — ask more questions!
Open-ended questions. Questions that start
with “what.” And let’s hear what happens.
Talk to you later!
